Dear Women, 

Please refrain from using the following phrases. We don’t know who taught you this but…no. 

I’m not that type of girl (You mean…the interesting type?) 

I’m not looking for anything casual (Don’t remember asking you, but ok) 

You’ll have to work for it (Thank you for the offer but I think I’ll pass. I already have a full time job) 

That’s for me to know and for you to find out (Original. Bravo) 

I’m bubbly (What does that even mean?) 

I love travelling (Who doesn’t?) 

There’s this guy I used to see a couple of months back and he’s been texting me lately…how annoying (What’s annoying is your constant need to make me jealous. Stop. It’s not working) 

I’ve been hurt in the past so don’t want to rush into things (We know it may come as a shock to you but we have feelings too. And a past. We just don’t let it determine our present) 

Girls night out!! Woohoo! #Cosmos #WhoNeedsMen (You are not Carrie or Samantha or any other member of the Sex and the City cast. You’re at the pub, by your house, drinking alcohol of questionable quality. Relax) 

All men want the same thing…(Yes. Find a woman that doesn’t put them in a category labeled “All men”) 

Is the football game more important than me? (For ninety minutes it kind of is. Sorry, not sorry) 

Most of my friends are guys…Hope you don’t mind… (Still not working…) 

Sincerely, 

Men