The whole money situation in a relationship is an interesting one.  

Because it’s rarely a case of a 50/50 split. The case where you buy him an expensive gift, he buys you one back, he pays for take out, and you pay for dessert. It’s ideal yes, but plausible? Not really. More often than not, one of the two has to take on the bigger financial load.  

“Baby, I’m thinking of booking Thailand in the summer. Go out for two weeks and explore. What do you think?” 

“I’d love to but I don’t think I have the money baby…I’m saving for Jenny’s wedding and I need to get my teeth done as well.” 

“Oh will you stop it with the money already? We’ve been together for three years. Forget about the money. I’ll take care of it. We need a vacation.” 

Sounds familiar? Thought it would.  

But then fast forward ten silly fights, two months of bad sex and a “the magic’s lost” type of long fall out and you find yourself from a dream-trip to Thailand, vacationing alone on Break-Up island.  

Then what? What do you do with money then?  

Granted this is not a divorce and there is no binding covenant forcing you to pay back any money to your ex, you’ll find that pride and ego can hold people accountable in ways that no law or lawyer could ever dream of doing.  

If you are the “I don’t think I have the money” person that took that trip to Thailand under the “Forget about the money. I’ll take care of it,” promise, do you pay that money back after the break up? And how much do you pay? Is there like a specific amount that covers shame and pride damage in relationships? 

And what if you are the one who invested the money in the relationship, do you ask for a refund? That sounds petty, right? But what if it was a lot of money, or what if you were dumped or cheated? Do you ask for it then? 

Relationships are costly and whilst we all pay with wasted time and damaged hearts, please be aware that pockets are in danger too.